My Story
I am a former Headteacher with over 20 years’ experience in the field of education. In the 70’s & 80’s, I grew up on one of the largest council estates in London, statistically speaking, I should never have made it to university much less become a Headteacher. But I did! The how and why I can only put down to the support I received from three sources of internal and external power: my belief in a higher power, my ancestry, and my immediate family.
When I reflect, it was the values, courage and wisdom I gained from all three that put me through university despite the challenges of growing up in economically challenging circumstances. It was the same high values, courage and wisdom that helped me overcome personal challenges when even with an honour’s degree, I found myself aged 30 as a single mother, unemployed but determined to create a better life for my son. And it is the same power that has seen me move from being unemployed to being a successful Headteacher, Coach, Mentor and Public Speaker.
There are often moments in your life that stand out like a folded corner of a page in a book - life defining moments. Often you don’t realise these moments exist, but they are there. These are the moments where your purpose is revealed and what you are capable of becomes clear. But often you get so caught up in daily life that you don’t take the time to reflect on the moment to really understand what you did right; to move beyond the ‘imposter syndrome’ that forms part of your daily life; and to build the confidence needed when committing to actions that will secure success in both your personal and working life.
One of these moments was when as a Human Resources Manager, I interviewed a young man who during the interview asked me curiously, how could he become a HR manager? I looked at this young man and I thought…why has no-one ever helped this young man plan his career goals? Why did it take until he was in an interview with me? That is probably where my journey as a coach really began. That simple question inspired me to take one of the biggest risks in my life. It reminded me that all I ever wanted was to help others achieve their goals and if I was going to do that, I needed to stay true to my beliefs and values; the value of wanting to make the world a better place, to make a positive difference in the lives of others. So, I resigned from a very secure post, took a year out of work and re-trained as a teacher!
These moments stand out for me because they tell a story of what I believe to be a successful life underpinned by the ability to be able to maximise opportunities when they appeared. It has never been easy but with the courage, determination and bravery that comes from those power sources, I have overcome tremendous hurdles and moved forward! At every moment, I had to believe that no matter how far I would fall, I had the knowledge, skills and values to overcome whatever barrier was put in front of me and make it work! My support network that includes very close friends and not so close acquaintances, have been the cornerstone that have held me up. They have at times been my cheerleaders, wiper of tears and the sources of information and knowledge that helped me figure out my next steps.
That courage and determination supported me to keep getting up when I felt I could not go on, to understand the value of continually developing myself, so that on my journey, when a gap appeared in the glass ceiling, that holds so many of us back, it made it harder for someone to say ‘No!’ This has all helped me over the last 20 years to have moved from being an unemployed single mother to being a successful headteacher, coach and mentor to running my own consultancy.
A fantastic life I believe…but along my journey, certain things just kept hitting me repeatedly…I found I often worked excessively long hours and the higher up the ladder I went, the less people I met who looked like me. By the time I became a Headteacher, I felt I was spending more time trying not to be undermined, than on helping those I had initially set out to help. Then one day it hit me…I was no longer happy…financially I was in a great place but in terms of my emotional well-being, it was not the life I had dreamed of and I was not living my purpose of helping others to be all they could be.
I realised that I had lost direction and there was a growing conflict between what I wanted my future to be and what my present life looked like. My network was strong with regards to my emotional well-being but on a professional level, I knew I needed support from someone who had experienced the challenges I was facing. Someone who would understand how destabilising the ‘imposter syndrome’ could be and who understood how the constant undermining from those above and below you could take a toll on even the most confident and self-assured. It was at this time a friend introduced me to a coach. At the time I had hit the brick wall and was not even sure that a coach could help me; however I found that each session forced me to challenge some of the limiting beliefs I had about myself and after much reflection I gained greater clarity about the direction and actions I needed to take.
Coaching with the right person, someone who I could trust not to judge me, helped remind me of the skills and strengths I always had within me to overcome challenges. The sessions brought me clarity and helped me regain my self-confidence. I can’t deny that the journey was challenging at times with some tears along the way but when the time was right coaching helped me to find the courage to act and to change direction.
On my journey, I found that I was also meeting so many amazing women who like me were also facing the challenges of having a career - some feeling the ‘imposter syndrome’; being a parent - and feeling guilty about the time spent away from their families; or often informal carer to parents and even vulnerable siblings - struggling to manage time effectively. These women were also struggling to achieve their goals. Over time, as others could see the success I was achieving, I found I was being asked more and more to mentor and coach others in need of support…there developed my life as a Leadership coach. Today after learning the lessons of my past, I am passionate about ‘giving back’, using my skills, knowledge and experience to help organisations and individuals to achieve their goals quicker than it took me.
I believe that when you have been as fortunate as I have you have a duty to give back and pull others along with you - pay it forward. Coaching is a powerful tool that when used correctly, gives you quality time to invest in your personal growth, to re-visit your strengths, set goals, act and achieve.
As an experienced Leadership & Educational Consultant, coach, mentor and public speaker, I believe that we have one life and that we deserve to give ourselves the best opportunity to be successful in a life where challenges continue to appear. Only by investing in our personal growth and being part of powerful professional networks are we going to achieve the impossible. I see the next stage of my journey is helping to empower others to be successful far quicker than it took me. Today I work with a diverse range of organisations and individuals at all stages of development, because what drives me is simply the need to create a fairer, happier world where there is greater equality of opportunity, in a society that is truly reflective of the diverse world we live in.